Is It Time For Bed Yet?

That is one of my favorite phrases as of late. SO SLEEPY! All Christmas day I was pretty much out of it. I was good that morning after I woke up but then it went downhill all day. We went to my parents first off and after the present opening I just sat on the couch and dozed while they played wii. Then we went home to his parents and I sat on THEIR couch and slept/dozed, lol. Of course getting up to pee and eat in between. Although I didn't feel like eating much at all. And that was pretty much Christmas! The next day was not near as bad, I was much more awake! Sunday was good though at about 2 I took a nice nap, lol.

Today the sleepiness is settling in again...I think I'm going to ask dad if I can get off an hour early so I can do my grocery shopping and get home!

I'm hungry AGAIN, couldn't eat much at lunch. I might get into my apple I brought...its SO HARD to find something I actually want to eat. That doesn't make the nausea come up in my throat. Which I am nauseated all day off and on anyway. But at least I still haven't thrown up! Yeah baby!

I hit the 9 week mark this week. Or so I am assuming. Still haven't been in to the doctors again. Only a little over a week tho! Finally! Its not this Thurs but the next. I hope they give me good news. We still have not sold that darn mustang of Lee's. But I know my dad will loan us the 1k if we need it. Then we have four months of $311 to pay. Yeah. Oh and get this. I got a bill in the mail the other day for $240 from my OBGYN appt in AUGUST! Yeah, thanks for the heads up guys. I had NO idea I was going to be billed additionally from what I paid in the office. Thanks a LOT. I was hot when I called them. I told them they had better not be doing that when I come in for my pregnancy. So we have to get that money up now. -_-' Its not like we don't already have enough to worry about. Oh well, its in Gods hands! They are more then capable.

So I got a food processor for Christmas! And the pioneer womans cookbook I've been wanting. Its awesome. I need to pick something to make out of it before I head to the store.

Well not a whole lot else going on. Till later!

Shes Gonna blow!

Well, seeing as I have skipped the whole ‘throwing up’ symptom of most pregnancies so far (knock on wood) I was hoping I also skipped the rolling emotions (screaming one minute and crying like a baby the next) but apparently I’m not that lucky!

 

Last night was a complete come apart. It was terrible. It really started the night before. But that was nowhere near as bad as last  night. We went to wal mart to get some groceries. I saw a SIX DOLLAR shirt that I really liked so I got it. Lee is going on and on about how we don’t have the money ect, and I’m like SHUT UPP, well I didn’t say that. I knew we had enough for a blasted shirt, and I have very few long sleeve shirts!

 

So then to get to the groceries you have to go by the baby stuff. I NEVER go into the baby area, I have never had a need to before now. So I wanted to look at the baby stuff! Well immediately Lee starts pulling on me going “the baby isnt born yet, you dont know what it is etc” I’m like ARGH! And I look at him and go “well when can I start looking at stuff?? When I’m 9 months pregnant and two days from my due date??” and he just looks at me and walks off. Great.

So from then on I am totally upset and annoyed with him. And I wanted this to be special! To look at stuff together! RUINED!!

 

So we get our groceries and drive home. And he’s saying hes sorry, etc. and I’m like you just aren’t getting what is important to me, you don’t care that I want to look at things like maternity clothes and baby stuff. And he keeps going on about how he knows me and I’m going to start buying stuff and we already don’t know where we’re going to get the money for the doctor. UH NO. I never said a WORD about buying ANYTHING! –_- ‘

 

Sigh. So we get home and I go to the room and slam the door and get in my pajamas and get in bed. I’m SO TIRED and hungry and just want it all to go AWAY. Lee puts the groceries up and comes in there saying he’s sorry again and wants to know whats wrong, and I’m like we just went over this. And I-CAN-NOT-STOP-CRYING. It got pretty ridiculous. Any time he looked at me or said anything it started all over again. SO ANNOYING! So finally he tucked me into bed and told me to go to sleep. So I laid there for a few minutes and decided I was too hungry to sleep and I didn’t want to be in there alone anyway. So I got up and ate like 5 or 6 of those chewy chips ahoys lol. Then off to bed.

 

So yeah, I’m like a ticking time bomb apparently. At any moment I could have a serious issue and not be able to stop crying! Fun fun. Poor Lee.

 

SO other then that I’ve been doing good. I’m getting increasingly tired and hungry though. I usually feel like taking at least one nap a day. I eat a LOT too. Well, not a lot, but frequently. I have to eat something at least every 2 hours or I get that hungry feeling in my stomach and feel ick. I’ve started bringing little snacks to work with me. Otherwise I’d starve! LOL. I’ve started to drink just water, I figure I don’t NEED to, but it definitely will be a benefit I’d say. Sometimes I have apple juice.

 

I’ve been having period like cramps for a few weeks now. At first of course I thought I was about to start, but now I know it is part of early pregnancy. They have subsided this week though. I also am a little light headed at times, and of course pee a lot, lol. In the mornings my stomach is a little upset, but not nauseous thankfully. If I don’t start throwing up in the next few weeks I think I’m home free.

 

So I called my OBGYN Monday and yesterday they called me back to tell me my first appointment isn't until JANUARY 7TH!! I’ll be 10 weeks! And thats a MONTH AWAY! Most people at least get in at 8 weeks! BOO. They are so overcrowded there. So I only see the nurses at that appointment, to go over family history and do some lab work. Then at 12 weeks I see the actual doctor and maybe have a ultrasound or hear the heart beat! I’m so excited about that.

But not that I won’t be getting in until after new years! Grr.

 

We have to come up with about $1,200 at our first appointment and then we have a balance of about another $1200 or so more to pay over four months. We are just trusting God that He is going to get us what we need. I know He will.

 

We are trying to sell Lees ‘65 mustang that he was going to restore. We bought it for $1,000 a few years ago so hopefully it will sell for that or more. Its on ebay and craigslist. We’ve had a few bites on craigslist, but no follow through yet. Three bids on ebay but they haven’t reached the reserve of 1,000 yet. It goes till Monday.

 

I’ve got my bow and accessories I could sell, Lee’s got a nice revolver…so we will see. I’m just glad we have stuff we can sell that has value.

 

YAWN, I could use a nap right NOW. So sleepy. I have started exercising, lol. I walk around in a big circle in the store in the morning for 30 minutes. Hey, it works! I just read my bible first and then grab another book and just walk around reading. I’ve done it three days in a row so far. I think after a week or so I might bring my 8lb weight and start lifting it as I walk. Hey, I have to be here anyway I might as well do something useful! Lee thinks I’m crazy. What does he know!

 

Well guess thats about all for now, until later!

You Know That ‘Something’?

That I wrote about yesterday? That thing I was sort of kind of freaking out about and dedicated a whole paragraph to??

 

Well, um, this is what it was about:

 

 

Yeah, IM PREGNANT!!! *faint*

 

*deep breath* Okay, I’m back. I still am in total unbelieving shock. But it doesn’t get too much more real at this point. I took myself off to the OBGYN first thing this morning to take a test there and guess what? The nurse came in smiling and said CONGRATULATIONS! *faint*

 

Okay, back again. Phew, I am not breathing right! All last night I was in turmoil.

 

Lets back up. So the month of October was my last period. In November I was supposed to start on the 22 or 23. I didn’t really think about that at the time because I don’t keep track of it that well. But after I got to Wednesday of this week and still there was not hide nor hair of it, I started thinking hmmm…actually it was Tuesday night that I suddenly said to Lee after we got in bed that I should have had it already. He was like “what are you trying to say?” and I said “I’m trying not to say ANYTHING” lol!

 

So Wednesday I went to walgreens before work and bought a pack of two pregnancy tests. Side note: Those freakin things are EXPENSIVE! A pack of 2 of the name brand are TWENTY DOLLARS. I got these for $10 because they were off brand.

 

Anywho, I didn’t take the test till late that night. I had to work and then I had choir practice. So I went in the bedroom and got in my pjs then grabbed a plastic cup out of the kitchen, lol, and snuck it by Lee who was watching tv. I did my thing and stuck the test in there, put the cap back on and I went away! I didn’t want to watch it. So 5 minutes later I came back and I was like, okay, here we go. I was afraid to look at it! I was sure it was going to be negative. And I was kind of wanting the other…and kind of not!

 

Well I finally worked up the nerve to look and then I had to do a double and triple take because it was POSITIVE!! I grabbed it and took off down the hall going "uh, LEE” he looked up from eating dinner and said “what??” in a voice like, uh oh, lol!

 

So after I showed him at first he said “are you kidding me?” And I was like UH NO I can’t fake that! Then he hugged me and I was about crying and we were like OH MAN! And then I kept going I can’t be pregnant, I can’t be pregnant! Lee was so sweet just holding me and saying nice things. Then I was like I need to talk to your mom!

 

So we called over there, it was like 10:30, thankfully they were still awake, and we drove over and I got her to talk to me in private. She was like is something wrong? I think I scared her! So after we got in the room I showed her the positive test and she said “are you pregnant??” and I was like I think so, I don’t know! And then I just LOST IT! I was crying and laughing and mostly just freaking out. Thinking of all the bad things that cold happen, how we have no insurance, etc. Thinking this can’t be happening!

 

So anyway she hugged me and sat down on the bed with me and we talked for a long time and she got me calmed down. Then Lee came in and we talked some more and it was just fun. We went back in the living room after about an hour and Lees dad was just pleased as punch you could tell! He has been wanting a grandchild for a while! We chatted a bit more and then went home.

 

It took me FOREVER to fall asleep! I bet I didn’t sleep till 1:00. Then I woke up at 2 to go to the bathroom and then couldn’t go back to sleep again until nearly 4! Then I was up with Lee at 6:30. So I’m going to be tired! I just couldn’t shut my mind off! I had to get Lee to distract me and tell me about work that day etc Then I started counting sheep/horses then just counting my breaths, ugh. It was torture! I just kept wishing it was tomorrow and  I knew if I was pregnant or not!

 

Well tomorrow it is and I am apparently!! My stomach has been ucky all morning. Not throwing up but you know…not fun! I think its just a combination of my taco bell dinner, lol, and nerves. I have got to calm down! I called a good friend of mine from college on the way to work and we both had a huge freak out on the phone together. She is pregnant as well! Due in February. She was so excited. Its going to be nice to have her to talk to about things since she has been through it recently and is my age and my friend. Unlike the moms, etc.

 

I called Lees mom on the way home first. She knew I was going in that morning. She was super excited too and kept telling me how I was going to be great and wonderful and everything would be great. She is going to be a lifesaver. Shes so sweet, but also will tell you like it is. She is def going to be in the delivery room with me! I will need her to whip the drs and nurses around and get me what I need/want! She gets the job done now!

 

Did I just say delivery room?? *double faint*

 

So thats all the drama for now! I will keep this updated! I want to record everything that goes on so I don’t forget it.

 

Tata!

Where Have I been?

Well not sure I have an answer for that. I’ve been here. Just not posting, lol. Of course my horse blog interest me more, so I post on there a lot. My regular life is just not that interesting.
I did get a new puppy!
Isn’t she the cutest thing since, uh…well anything?! I named her Missie. She sure is a Miss Priss! She is a total spit fire and I’m having fun with her ;). She definitely tries my patience sometimes though. I got her about 3 weeks ago. Still battling with the potty training. Its getting better…I think.
I have already taught her to sit and speak and sit up, we are working on laying down. That one is really hard for her. She did it once! Haven’t seen it again, lol.
I’ve been thinking about something ever since last night. Something I’m afraid to say out loud to anyone but Lee…something that scares the you know what out of me, but also excites me to unheard of heights. Something that is probably totally not what I’m thinking it is…but at the same time could be… Something that I really hope is not, and yet if it is not, I’ll be more disappointed then I want to be…shhh, just pretend I didn’t say anything!!

I will definitely be updating if this something comes about/is true. But I gotta keep my mouth shut. I gotta stop thinking about it! Okay! No more.

Gosh its only 4:30 and it looks like 6 outside. I hate when it gets dark so early. Doesn’t help that its really cloudy out.

Choir practice tonight. We have been practicing for the Christmas service lately. Its all the same songs we do every year and we all know them backwards and forwards, but its fun to sing them. And just hang out with each other. I have to close at work though and that means I have to rush home change to a skirt and run back to church. I only have to close the first Wednesday of the month though, thankfully.

I hate working here around Christmas. It gets really busy and I have to work more hours/days. I have to work the next two Saturdays after this. BOO, and Christmas Eve. Ugh. This is the first year where its only me and the boss. We usually have one other co worker to take the pressure of one of us if we are sick, worked too much, have a party, etc. But now its jus us two. I’ll be glad when December is over!
Well Lee and I went deer hunting last Saturday morning. That was fun. We got up at about 5:30 and went out there before it got light. I wasn’t too keen on getting up in the tree stand, even though its pretty substantial compared to some! Its a two seater.

Us up in the tree stand!

Sadly we saw nary a deer, just a lot of squirrels. They would also make noises in the bushes/trees and get us all excited thinking there was a deer coming! Mean squirrels. We stayed out there till about 8:00 and then came in. I made us pancakes and then we went over and hung out with the in laws for awhile. That afternoon Lees brother got his horse out and his dad rode him (first time in 2 years!) then his sister got her 2 year old gelding out and lunged him around a bit with a saddle. Still too small to ride.

Well thats about it! Almost time to head home. Ta ta!